Pineapple is the second most common safeword, preceded only by red. Seriously, look it up. There’s a couple random words in the top ten list, like unicorn, but it’s mostly assorted fruits and colors. Of course, there’s also pineapple juice, but that’s a different story. (“That is change. You know how long it took me to acquire those? Some of those are limited edition.” LOL!)
Mr.R and I have had a couple conversations about picking and using a safeword. So far, we haven’t found much of a need for one. Saying stop, no, or other words that literally mean stop aren’t part of our play, and could always be used safely between us. We communicate about these things really openly and frequently. Also, our 22+ years of fucking has led us to knowing each other pretty well. Once, my Master paused for me in the middle of some pretty serious banging when I gave a very simple move, a single finger. Somehow he just knows.
There’s a great quick overview and discussion on submissiveguide.com that I think speaks to our needs well.
Do you need a safeword?https://submissiveguide.com/safety/articles/to-safeword-or-not-to-safeword
That all depends. I would recommend that if you have never played with this person before that you have one. Other situations that would warrant guarding a safeword would be new play activities, extremely risky play and anything in a public play space.
There are people who do not use safewords for one reason or another. I’m not here to discredit them or say that having a safeword is the only way to play, but it is a safer way for new experiences. I can assume that later on in my relationship that a safeword would become obsolete as my Master and I are very intuitive of each other and we know the responses for the other during play. He can read me like a book most of the time and feel very safe with him.
I like the idea of quick check-ins when experimenting with something new, or during any heavy kink play, new or not. I’m talking about extreme bondage, heavy impact, or serious spanking. Using green, yellow, and red as quick answers to a “how are you doing” in the middle of play can be effective signals without having to go into explanations that may otherwise bog down the mood.
Of course, there’s what to do next, after you have used your safe word. I think submissive guide is another great resource on that too.