Spanking has got to be the gateway drug into D/s and BDSM in general. And why wouldn’t it be? Spanking is the best! I, personally, can’t seem to stop talking about it. I even had to make a whole category.
Flogging is the next step up, spanking’s big sister, if you will. I can’t really say which I refer, both are pretty great. We have a pretty standard leather flogger, nothing special. We got it at a local chain store years ago. However, it is getting worn out, so Master has asked me to go buy a new one. Etsy has become my favorite place to shop for BDSM gear. I love all the quality handmade leather goods available on there (and there’s nothing like supporting your crafty, kinky community).
A flogger is a collection of (usually leather) tails bound together into one handle. They come in different lengths, colors, and have varying amounts of straps. Some have weighted straps, or are studded. There are floggers made of chain, and other materials, but they shouldn’t be used unless the Top has a great deal of experience.
I don’t swing the flogger, I get flogged. So I’m not going to try and speak on standing or swinging technique at all. There are tons of great videos and tutorials out there for that. I can tell you there are safe places to hit, like the buttocks and the back. There are also dangerous places to hit, like the lower back (i.e. kidneys), and along the spine. I can also tell you the Top needs to watch where they stand in relation to their bottom. Standing too close or too far away from the bottom will result in poorly placed hits, and cause unwanted pain. Standing too close can cause the tips of the tails to wrap around the edge of the bottom. With the acceleration of the curve, this creates an intense, unwanted pain, and can break a mood and be dangerous. Standing too far can cause just the tips of the tails to hit the bottom, which stings a lot. Ideally the top should hit their bottom with a quarter to a third (at the most) of the tails.
For me, flogging will send me to subspace faster then spanking. Though a combination of the two is really the way to go. Like spanking, you should have a warm up period with lighter impacts, so the bottom is getting that endorphin rush going before swinging harder. I’ve read that is can take ten minutes, but I’m sure I’ve gotten there much faster, so I don’t think there is a hard rule.
When you’ve gotten more experience you can move into more advanced techniques, including intensifying the pain with floggers that carry more weight or are made of chains (ouch!). Advanced techniques also include using 2 floggers at once. To do this the Top has to swing them each in circles rhythmically, so they crisscross into a figure 8 motion. I imagine the motion feels like swinging two jump ropes at once. I’ve only seen it on youtube, but I’m hoping it works it’s way into our kink someday soon.
Flogging centers me. Usually Master puts me up against the wall for flogging, which is most frequently during our morning ritual. I long to be tied to the ceiling, or something similar while getting flogged, but I think that would take a weekend away. It would also be nice to be able to fall limp while getting flogged. It really is that relaxing. But that would require some kind of heavy equipment we don’t presently have access to. Maybe someday.
The new flogger I picked out is red and black, and a bit longer then the original one we had. After we break it in, I’ll let you know how it goes. If Master permits, I’ll post a picture. He keeps a collection of the red marks that criss-cross my back after a good flogging, and then makes me look at them. They always make me smile. 🙂