How to use PUNISHMENT to shape your dynamic effectively.

Punishment, or more accurately, your use of punishment is a major element in any power-exchange relationship. That doesn't mean you should definitely have it. It does mean you should definitely talk about it, have negotiated norms and expectations around it. You should also leave room to renegotiate those terms as time passes and your dynamic … Continue reading How to use PUNISHMENT to shape your dynamic effectively.

I’ll take some Rules, Consequences, and Pretty Things.

I would argue all relationships have rules. Maybe they aren't written down, but they are there, under the surface. An expectation or a condition that, if it isn't met, has consequences. They naturally grow and change with time, and are driven by some need, either spoken or silent, by one or both of the partners. … Continue reading I’ll take some Rules, Consequences, and Pretty Things.