This year, as part of our annual review at our D/s-iversary, we created a new collaring ritual. Our ritual holds great purpose and meaning, the most significant of which is grounding ourselves in our individual roles as dominate and submissive. It reinforces our power exchange by centering our minds on those roles for the day. … Continue reading Designing my Collaring to be Open and Focused
Not all power exchange dynamics include acts of service. While it is more common than punishment, it is still one of those things that doesn't fit everyone. It also fits in dynamics differently for different people. For some, acts of service go both ways; from each side of the slash to the other. For others, … Continue reading Is this an Act of Service or a Chore?
Communication is a tricky thing. It comes and goes, waxes and wanes. What you do with it can make or break a situation or a relationship. Having it alone isn't enough. Quantity does not equal quality, and sometimes less is more. But not having enough can be death's kiss. If you are in a power-exchange … Continue reading Here’s 4 ways to strengthen your communication
This next post from the 30 days of D/s is about Tasks and rituals. We have a few daily routines that keep our D/s strong and in place every day. If you are looking to start a power-exchange, this is the place to start, by building routines and rituals. They can be a place to … Continue reading The Daily Routines that Bind us
We entered into our full-time power exchange over a year ago. When we did, daily maintenance spankings instantly became part of our morning ritual, which in turn evolved into my daily collaring. Our ritual consisted of three parts; inspection, impact\spanking, and mantras. Each step was designed with intentional thought, driven from some need one of … Continue reading Morning Maintenance Spankings: A year-long reflection
I think a D/s relationship, especially a 24/7 D/s relationship requires an unusually high level of trust. Higher then most relationships, higher then a standard vanilla relationship. It also fosters and grows a heightened level of trust, making the need and feeding of trust cyclic. I think a great deal of that trust building comes … Continue reading Trust is a five-letter word.
Mr.R and I are closing in on our move. Our house is in the most orderly disarray possible. Everything is set to show the house for potential buyers, it is all so shiny. And also impossible to really live in. A necessary evil. We've had many showings, a couple offers (that we turned down), and … Continue reading A change is coming.
I got my second tattoo done! (Well, second of the three new ones I had planned, 4th tattoo in total.) I super love this one! I went to a different artist. The artist consultation I originally went to a while back didn't fully jive with me, so I have been bouncing around, looking for someone … Continue reading Celestial Tattoo
I would argue all relationships have rules. Maybe they aren't written down, but they are there, under the surface. An expectation or a condition that, if it isn't met, has consequences. They naturally grow and change with time, and are driven by some need, either spoken or silent, by one or both of the partners. … Continue reading I’ll take some Rules, Consequences, and Pretty Things.
This 30 Days topic is about the ups and downs of life, the things that bring stress into a relationship, the things that pull you out of your D/s dynamic. I heard once that money, parenting, and the in-laws are the three biggest causes of divorce in a marriage. I would wager that was also … Continue reading The Waxing and Waning of D/s