How to Improve and Strengthen your D/s with a Living Contract

Many people think of contracts as a statement, or possibly a list, written and signed on a particular date. It locks a moment in time, and the agreements made in that moment. While this process works for some, many find it cumbersome, too rigid, and hard to keep current. Sometimes people accidently lock down a … Continue reading How to Improve and Strengthen your D/s with a Living Contract

Gaining pleasure in our surprising progress

Master and I took a minute to go over our rules this morning. It seemed like time, since we hadn't done it in a while. Or so I thought. Covid-time has got me all messed up, and it turned out the last time we wrote something out wasn't all that long ago, last february. The … Continue reading Gaining pleasure in our surprising progress

What Orgasm Denial can do for you.

I don't know when I last had an orgasm. My best approximation is the middle to the end of March. My Master decided to start a denial period at the beginning of April, however, that isn't when I last had an orgasm. We had already been edging for a couple days before that, but I … Continue reading What Orgasm Denial can do for you.

Umm, excuse me. My collar is up here.

Over the past couple weeks I have been able to wear my leather slave collar out in public pretty consistently. This is mostly because we've been away from our vanilla life and kids, hanging out at our other house. It's a fun and safe place for us to play in in a truly full time … Continue reading Umm, excuse me. My collar is up here.

A change is coming.

Mr.R and I are closing in on our move. Our house is in the most orderly disarray possible. Everything is set to show the house for potential buyers, it is all so shiny. And also impossible to really live in. A necessary evil. We've had many showings, a couple offers (that we turned down), and … Continue reading A change is coming.

I’ll take some Rules, Consequences, and Pretty Things.

I would argue all relationships have rules. Maybe they aren't written down, but they are there, under the surface. An expectation or a condition that, if it isn't met, has consequences. They naturally grow and change with time, and are driven by some need, either spoken or silent, by one or both of the partners. … Continue reading I’ll take some Rules, Consequences, and Pretty Things.

The Waxing and Waning of D/s

This 30 Days topic is about the ups and downs of life, the things that bring stress into a relationship, the things that pull you out of your D/s dynamic. I heard once that money, parenting, and the in-laws are the three biggest causes of divorce in a marriage. I would wager that was also … Continue reading The Waxing and Waning of D/s

Ya put your D/s in. Ya put your D/s out. Ya put your D/s in, and ya shake it all about!

The next 30 days topic from Loving BDSM is about maintaining D/s when you're apart. This could be in a long distance relationship, through dating, traveling, or any other space that pulls you out of that headspace. For us, that is our simple, everyday life. Neither of our jobs are such that we can stay … Continue reading Ya put your D/s in. Ya put your D/s out. Ya put your D/s in, and ya shake it all about!

The ways in which I submit.

Master asked me to make a list of all the ways I submit. I'm not sure what he expected, but what he got was a T-chart which I had to stop after 4 pages due to time constraints. As a teacher, graphic organizers are a serious bit of fun for me. Somewhere in the back … Continue reading The ways in which I submit.

A need, a desire, and an idea

I like the way this topic is brought up in 30 Days of D/s; Negotiation is a fancy word for talk. With 20 years of marriage already under our belt, my Dom and I have certainly gone through some ups and downs, and learned how to talk under a myriad of circumstance and needs along … Continue reading A need, a desire, and an idea